Learning to Listen

 

A Review of Mortimer Adler's How to Speak How to Listen. New York: Simon and Schuster, 1997.

Communication is becoming a lost art. A mere scan of news channels or one’s Facebook feed demonstrates that many do not appreciate opposing opinions. Recent books like Alan Jacob’s How to Think, or Justin Lee’s Talking Across the Divide address the difficulty of speaking and listening to those who hold differing opinions. But communication is more than being polite when someone contradicts you. It requires thinking, pondering, and gently probing to understand what the other person is saying. It requires careful consideration of how your own words, facial expression, and body language will be understood, and striving to use these methods of expression to appropriately convey your meaning.

Mortimer Adler understood the importance of communication. His most famous work, How to Read a Book, is a timeless guide to understanding what we read. In that work he calls the reader to treat a book’s author like a conversation partner, one whom we should approach with magnanimity. His advice has helped many students gain a better grasp on receiving written communication.

Forty years later he wrote another, less famous book on communication, How to Speak, Hot to Listen. The lessons presented in How to Speak are no less important today than they were when he first penned them. Not only does he present the basics of speaking and listening, he explains the why we should care about the topic to begin with. This book is for those who are interested in communication, but he doesn’t stop there. Adler demonstrates how communication is not the end, but the means to an even greater gift: communion with others.

The book begins with two introductory chapters in which he addresses the problem of communication. The second part of the book explains various methods of public speaking, e.g. rhetoric, sales speech, lectures, etc. and how one should prepare for them. These should not be skipped over lightly because one never knows when it might be necessary to publicly address a group. The third part of the book explains what Adler calls “silent listening,” or how one should listen to public speech. He admonishes hearers to listen actively rather than passively, to carefully consider the message of the speaker and how it applies to the hearer. Part four discusses communication in day-to-day conversation. The most notable chapter of that section to me was chapter nine, “Question and Answer Sessions: Forum”. It details how one should participate when there are public meetings that allow short question and answer times between individuals. It is particularly applicable to our social media age, when short posted statements are often quickly followed by immediate responses. The lessons in this chapter may seem dated, but are still important.

My favorite chapter  was the last one, where Adler discusses the connection of conversation to being human. While all mammals communicate in some fashion, God made man with the ability to have fellowship with others, which is something the animals can never have. He then refers to Rene Descartes, the French philosopher who said that man differs from matter primarily because matter can’t think as man can. To apply this lesson today, artificial intelligence can only respond as it was programmed to respond. No matter how detailed it gets, when it is traced back to its origin, those programmed responses have their origin in man. This differentiation is sorely needed today in an age when more and more interaction is mechanical. One recent commercial showed an only child “communicating” with a robot child, and the parents looking on happily. This exemplifies the problem Adler points out. When the meaning of human communion through communication is lost, the result is the confusion in which we live. The first appendix, a lecture given by Adler to the American Association of Neurological Surgeons, solidly presents further evidence for why machines can never be truly conversant with people.

Dr. Adler’s background as a philosopher is evident in his writing (I mean that as a compliment). As a classical scholar, he uses language to help the reader think about what writes, not just to score quick rhetorical points or quickly persuade the reader. This book might be a challenge for some who only want a quick, self-help book, but it rewards the reader who ponders its meaning. It is evident that he wants to help the reader grow not only as a communicator but as a human being. If communication is indeed a means to communion, Adler’s book will aid all those who pursue that worthy goal.  ow How to Speak